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| #MeToo: Kashmir women's group drops bomb-shell on sexual harassment | | Names journos, politicians, bureaucrats | | Early Times Report
Jammu, Oct 9: Kashmir Women's Collective (KWC), a social media group on Facebook, claiming to be working for the cause of women, has created a storm by accusing some journalists, politicians, bureaucrats and others of sexual harassment.
"We at KWC strongly and unequivocally condemn such attitudes and behaviours and are with all the victims who came out with their stories. Their stories give courage to other women and nearly all women experience such realities on a daily basis," says the post.
"We understand that a conservative society like Kashmir will show backlash in form of dishonoring women who speak up and by shutting down and denying access to certain professions and public spaces to women on the pretext of, women can accuse us. This is an unsaid norm in certain professions already. But women are not mad that they will put their honour at risk and call out on men randomly, please get them before making any such irresponsible comment," the post adds.
"We believe that keeping out women is no answer but making workplaces and private spaces safe for women is the actual remedy which in turn means to hold men accountable and responsible for their actions after sensitising and educating them about nuances of gender," the post adds.
The group wants more women to send their complaints. "No more silences please. Send us your accounts, we will annonymously publish them as part 2 to this after basic fact check or evidence and we will carry on with this practice of shaming abusers publicly."
The group said that "We are well aware that men and boys also get sexually molested by other men and we will carry your stories too, if you wish us too."
The post has subsequently added some complaints about individuals and claims that same was sent by victims. The excerpts of the text are given below in verbatim but the names have been with held.
Case 1
Abuser: Name withheld
Occupation: Political Analyst
(Name Withheld), a renowned journalist and a columnist, married with kids, is known to hide this fact and constantly try to lure girls as old as 20.
"While he's not writing, he's chatting up with young females and flirting with girls his daughter's age at one occasion he asked me to meet him in private. The saddest part is when a group of Kashmiri women sit down and chat the recurring name that pops up is that of Name withheld". Anonymous further says we want to highlight it with anonymity because the society is so patriarchal that they will shame us for talking to men especially on chat.
He did the same thing to another girl and acted like a friend with evil intentions. He used to call her, but she never responded.
Case 2
Abuser: Name withheld
Occupation: Contractual Lecturer, Peace and Conflict, IUST
A victim confided and shared how he mentally torture her as his teacher by sharing her story as;
This is a time when (name withheld) was a teacher at my university, and we were in a gathering of 20 people, then we started to play a game of truth or dare; where he asked personal questions and went to the extent of accusing me of boarding a car every day with some guy. I think the sole intention at that time was spoiling my "character". Not only this he also talked trash about his co academics. He consistently bragged about how women are "intohen". This whole episode caused me unimaginable distress. Although I know that your case with this man is much worse than anything I went through but I thought I should share this with you showing himself as a victim too.
She further said, (name withheld ) further asked her, do you have a boyfriend which he should not ask as my teacher and when I replied no. He gave an idiotic smile saying, "I know who is dropping you University every day" " Mein sab Khabar rakhta hu". I was really hurt and broke down into tears. I even tried to ask him later why he spoke all trash inside the room to which he replied, I love to do this.
Case 3
Abuser: name withheld
Occupation: Journalist
The Editor of (name withheld) Magazine already has been accused of sexual harassment by multiple women. Though he has denied tendered an unconditional apology to the victims. However, this is not going to help him anyway. We are going to share a story of another victim which will testify that all the allegations cannot be shut down as ' revenge for an ex ', and he cannot just get away. This incident happened on 26 April 2017. The anonymous shared what happened to her as:
"I'd never heard the name (name with held ) nor met the person before that evening. It is probably the worst set of coincidences and probabilities that resulted in me ending up sharing that space with (name withheld). Of course, there were other people there too, but no one was creepy or acted disturbingly. Let me correct that...it wasn't scary it was outright offensive.
I was in the kitchen doing dishes when I decided to go to the room to check on my friend who was sleeping. I found him there lurking around, and I just found it weird. Most people had left, and it was pretty later, so I expected him and (other man) to either go or settle down. But that apparently wasn't the case.
After I was done checking on my friend, he held my hand and asked me for a kiss. I was taken aback by request and said no
Case 4
Abuser: (name withheld)
Occupation: DD Anchor
There are two cases of sexual harassment against (name withheld). He harassed co-workers while working there. The Anonymous 1 recalled her wounding memories as:
I was perusing my masters when I heard from some friends that Doordarshan is starting a new show and are looking for some fresh faces. I went to the station and later on the qualified audition as well. I began hosting Good Morning JK and was paired with (name withheld). Initially, he pretended to be nice, and soon I got to know his intentions. He said I am beautiful and intelligent and no one can do a live show with such confidence etc. After the show would end, I used to rush to university, and one day he said that he is taking the same route and can drop me. I denied and told my friends to wait for me, and they must be waiting. He took my phone from the table and said dial them it's just a matter of one call. While driving, he started praising me a lot and finally said he likes me. I started maintaining distances onwards and spoke to him only during the show and explicitly told him not to talk to me even after our professional duties are over. This annoyed and I was adamant that I need to carry on with work. When he was not able to break my spirit, he did such a dirty trick that left me trembling and in shock. One day after the show was over I was working on a story for the campus magazine. There were 5-7 people, and I left my laptop on the table and went to wash my face. He had plugged in his pen drive and copied all of my pictures. He started sending me those pictures and threatened me that he can do anything now.
Case 5
Abuser: College Professor
A woman shared her experience of sexual harassment in college as; "We had a prof at college.
I once talked to him about the work I do. He helped me in getting my admission done to a subject through which he got my number. Later he called me hundreds of times and texted on WhatsApp". He also asked me to meet him outside the college. Subsequently, I confronted him at college to which he shamed me and said to me that I was once interested in him. He slut-shamed me there. And believe me, it was tough to confront. I almost lost my college admission. On Eid Eve he asked me to share my picture of "Eid dress" in his words to see how I look.
Case 6
Abuser: (name withheld)
Occupation: Political worker
The victim was sexually harassed by (name withheld). She described it as "Once he came to Delhi and asked me too to meet, and I also was happy to meet him, he first asked me to meet him at the place he was staying at. I denied and then we planned to meet at the coffee shop.
After talking for a while, we went to sit outside. There, he first asked me why I was sitting away from him making the distance. (That was intentional though because I didn't like him calling me at his temporary place). I avoided the question with a smirk. He then put his hand on my thigh. (I was clothed correctly, wasn't drunk and wasn't delirious as well) I didn't say anything in the first instance, I just looked at his hand and then him, he said while his hand was on my thigh, "what happened, do you mind if I keep my hand on your thigh"
Case 7
Abuser: Media Person
Another girl anonymously reported the culture of sexual harassment in Kashmir Media Industry as:
Sometime back, a friend of mine and I were discussing certain men in Kashmir who we have heard in whispers of having done the sexual harassment with co-workers. There is a culture of brotherhood between writers/journalists etc in Kashmir. They hide each other's mistake, cover them up. The victim, in the end, is a woman who is unaware of the man's reputation.
I spent like half an afternoon with another group of people the next day, they all seemed nice. When I got back, I did feel discomfort at certain things. One of them said but just brushed it off. In Delhi, I started seeing posts that he is known for sleeping with many young girls, tourists, on the pretext of love and marriage.
Case 8
Abuser: (Name Withheld)
Occupation: Former bureaucrat
In my first job my boss (Name Withheld), a retired engineer, who had been re-employed by the Ministry of Rural Development, GOI, harassed me repeatedly and systematically. Would pass remarks and try to get me alone in a room. Somehow, I always avoided it by making excuses. On a field trip to Gurez, he was in the same car as us two girls and two other men. He touched me inappropriately. I was too shocked to say anything but just changed my seat in the car. For this, he stopped my salary, took out a bunch of explanations to which I replied. Eventually, I filed a legal notice against him asking why I should not take him to court for stopping my salary (as this constituted a breach of contract) He sent the salary the very next day, and I left the job.
Case 9
Abuser: (Name Withheld)
Occupation: Bureaucrat
I have a confession too. (Name Withheld), an officer, tried to molest me in his office. He called me to his office. An official was with me. He sent the other man in the office away. He stood up from his chair and tried to kiss me forcefully. I pushed him back, slapped him but was trembling and left. He was saying, I love you in return as if saying this statement is a justification for this behaviour.
Despite repeated attempts the accused couldn't be contacted for comments. |
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